Advent and the Season of Singleness

Diana Tsitsi Gracia Chigumba

I have a new a love-dislike relationship going on with the season of Advent. It’s one of my favourite times of the year, the anticipation, the joy, the preparation, the waiting for Christmas and the countdown it represents; what’s not to love. But the past couple of years since I have been living alone a new dimension had been introduced. I am alone… When I lived with my siblings, I asked them what they wanted to do for Advent, they rarely gave input and we would end up doing some new fangled “tradition” I found trending, from Jesse trees, to Advent leaves on the wall daily, to Advent sweet calendars or candle calendars, and daily prayer lighting each one. I roped them into some sort of tradition. Alone it just does not hold the same pull.

This year I got candles, 24 of them, 3 purple, one pink and 20 tealights. I put them in a table centre piece… and that’s about it. I’ve read the occasional Pinterest Advent posts but nothing has really stuck, nothing shouts out “Do me!”, nothing is helping me prepare. Last year was even more sparse. The Advent and Christmas season are such family oriented holidays it’s just weird to do them alone. Most of my family is leagues away so planning is done around June to see who will be on the African continent… no one this year. And then all the plans of how I’d celebrate advent it if I had a family all my own begin to bloom. I do believe as a single woman Advent has suddenly become the hardest time in which to wait. I wait on the Lord and His will when it comes to marriage. But I’ve never been an idle waiter. I wait in action. Typical Advent actions though just involve people. I wait upon the Lord and love to use the gifts He has given me to do His will but in Advent you just want to share.

The beauty I guess is that the waiting always ends in the coming of the Christ child and immeasurable joy. So this Advent  am gong to try to focus on that, that there is immeasurable joy waiting for me, this may be the groaning stage, but the wait will be well worth it.

So how are all the singles out there handling Advent? Want to come help me light my candles and read  some preparing for the baby Jesus readings? The candles are ready and waiting 🙂


geralt / Pixabay


Diana Tsitsi Gracia Chigumba

About Diana Tsitsi Gracia Chigumba

Diana is a radically pro-life catholic young fogey! Enjoying life and seeing where the good Lord leads is her passion, thou at times she wants to take control and finds it difficult to follow or hear Him.

Showing 3 comments
  • Yvonne

    Hi Di

    Good one there.

    Besides drowning with my work l look forward to Christmas. Even if l will be far from family. I will invite friends and cousins.

    I will be alone most of the time but l take Dec as my me time now. Time to reflect on previous year to pray and to plan on the new year.

  • yvonne

    Hi Di very good articule.

    I am never lonely this time of the yera l take it as my me time. Time to reflect, plan ahead. I also accommodate those with no one to celebrate with for lunch at my place.

    Its a time to give for me. To show love unto other people and try and find God in everything l do again.

  • MarieAnne teBrake
    MarieAnne teBrake

    This is the first time in our 35 years of marriage that Christo and I will be alone – with our laatlammetjie Tarryn, of course – and you know what? I’m actually looking forward to the quiet time. I have my advent wreath on my table, we will put up the Christmas tree so the grandies can received their gifts before they all go away with their parents on holiday and then its just the 3 of us – lots of time to reflect on and anticipate the Real Birthday Gift! Blessed Christmas everyone!

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